Well hell... I say it's Movie Game time!!

Only rule - no damn googling or using IMDB.

I'll start with someone easy: Adam Sandler

Movie meme

1. "As if." 

"Oh, really, Alicia?"

Scream guessed by Livvy

2. "Yeah, I'm crazy.  Ask my mom."

Wild Things guessed by Livvy

3. "Do you think maybe you wanna maybe, I don't know, go out to dinner, you know, catch up on old times?" 

"Didn't we just do that?"  

There's Something About Mary guessed by Anna

4. "Any questions?" 

"Just one. Why are these ceilings so low?"  
"Low overhead, my boy - we pass the savings on to you! But seriously, that'll all be covered in the orientation."

Being John Malkovich guessed by Celeste

5. "I'm very discreet... but I will haunt your dreams."

40 year old virgin guessed by Anna

6. "Okay Cool, man, the day a monkey comes out of my butt is the day you'll get your sorry." 

"What a coincidence, because that's TODAY."

Bruce Almighty guessed by Livvy

7. "Oh, maybe if I get really lucky, I'll get to grow up and listen to Air Supply and wear jack boots." 

"What's wrong with Air Supply?"  
"Nothing, if you're the cop from the Village People."

Rock Star guessed by Livvy

8. "Aren't you gonna take your skates off?" 

"I never take my skates off."

Boogie Nights guessed by Sonny

9. "Did you see those, those raisins on TV? The ones that sing and dance and stuff?" 

"They scare me."  
"Yeah me too"  
"It's sick. The commercial people they make them sing and dance so people will eat them."

Benny and Joon guessed by Anna and Sonny

10. "Did she tell you we had sex? So vigorous!"

Lake Placid guessed by Livvy

11. "What's your rush, dollbody? What do you say we slip in the back seat, and make a man out of me?" 

"What do you say I smack you around for a while?"  
"Can't we do both?"

A League of their Own guessed by Celeste

12.  "If you don't let me gut out this house and make it my own, I will go insane and I will take you with me!"

Beetlejuice guessed by Anna

13. "Mom, what'd you mean when you said Dorian was your favorite?" 

"Oh, Angus, I love you both."  
[Holds thumb and forefinger an inch apart]
"It's a difference of *this* much."

Homefries guessed by Anna (sorry Celeste!)

14. "I need a corporal. You're it, until you're dead or I find someone better."

Starship Troopers guessed by Celeste

15. "Life is full of interruptions and complications."

Love Actually guessed by Anna

Bonus points if you give the trail of movie - actor - movie etc that links all these fun quotes together.

Movie Meme - Livvy (Round 2)

Hopefully this one will be harder. But, who knows? I'm off to class though, so I won't be able to tell you if you're right until later tonight. Have fun :)!!

1. "Good question, Aguado. First, I'd establish a motive. In this case the killer saw the size of the bug's DICK and became insanely jealous. Then I'd lose 30 pounds... PORKIN' his wife."
Ace Venture: Pet Detective, guessed by Anna.

2. "Oh don't you lay that on me! I have orgasms everyday I've just gotten so use to having them when you're not in the room."
Something to Talk About, guessed by Celeste and Anna :).

3. "I figure the bed's one of those vibratin' numbers, so that explains all the quarters. Nobody could possibly fancy pretzel twists that much so I reckon you won some kinda weird contest. As for the condoms, well, either you got a yen for cheerleadin' squads or we had the night of all nights, whatever, there's an explanation. As for the blue chicken, I need a little help with that one."
Flesh and Bone, guessed by Anna

4. "You mean she bit you?"
"No, her dog!"
"Oh, she bit her dog, eh?"
The Wizard of Oz, guessed by Celeste.

5. "How are you supposed to know? Fucking men like you built the hydrogen bomb. Men like you thought it up. You think you're so creative. You don't know what it's like to really create something; to create a life; to feel it growing inside you. All you know how to create is death..."
"Mom."
"...and destruction... "
"Mom! We need to be a little more constructive here, okay?"
Terminator 2, guessed by Anna.

6. "I love that you get cold when it's 71 degrees out. I love that it takes you an hour and a half to order a sandwich. I love that you get a little crinkle above your nose when you're looking at me like I'm nuts. I love that after I spend the day with you, I can still smell your perfume on my clothes. And I love that you are the last person I want to talk to before I go to sleep at night. And it's not because I'm lonely, and it's not because it's New Year's Eve. I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible."
When Harry met Sally, guessed by Anna.

7. "Hey, what kind of belt do you have?"
"Canvas. JC Penney, 3.98; You like?"
Karate Kid, guessed by Anna.

8. "Don't eat that!"
"Why?"
"Don't you know that eating that stuff can give you very large breasts?"
[looks down]
"Oh, my God! I'm too late!"
Real Genius, guessed by Anna.

9. "[being chased by terrorists] Let's see if you bastards can do 90."
Back to the Future, guessed by Celeste.

10. "Alright, I'll make out with you. But no fucking 'cause I'm straight."
Freeway, guessed by Anna.

11. "Why are you dressed so scary?"
"It's Halloween."
Mean Girls, guessed by Celeste.

12. "What about love?"
"Overrated. Biochemically no different than eating large quantities of chocolate.
Devil's Advocate, guessed by Anna.

13. "You're getting a lion?"
"Yeah."
"Why?"
"To protect my shit."
"Never heard of a dog?"
"Dude, you can get past a dog. Nobody fucks with a lion."
"Yeah, that's true."
Grandma's Boy, guessed by Celeste.

14. "Me? I'm scared of everything. I'm scared of what I saw, I'm scared of what I did, of who I am, and most of all I'm scared of walking out of this room and never feeling the rest of my whole life the way I feel when I'm with you."
Dirty Dancing, guessed by Celeste.

15. "God... I heard about the Alphabet Bomber. Bombs exploding in the... in the airport... and barber shop..."
"That's right. All in alphabetical order. Car wash... drug store... I used to lay in my crib and hear him scream in his sleep...”A,B,C,D,E,F,G... BOOM! BOOM!""
"But your mom..."
"My mother tried to stop him. She couldn't even spell, for Christ's sake but they fried her too."
Cry Baby, guessed by Pesto (that's for calling me a copy cat...I can't help it if it takes a long time to compile a list and you posted yours before me...thpppt)!

Movie Meme - Celeste rides again!

1. "I came here to study the great American art of muff diving. To smack clam, munch rug, dine at just one American pink taco stand! You know, I wanted to, how is it, park the porpoise. You know? I want to take it through the car wash, baby. And get it waxed. I want to wax it. Wax it! You know, and air dry. Air dry that shit, yeah!"
Van Wilder - guessed by Anna

2. "There was a moment last night, when she was sandwiched between the two Finnish dwarves and the Maori tribesmen, where I thought, 'Wow, I could really spend the rest of my life with this woman'."
Zoolander - guessed by Anna

3. "We're clearly soldiers in petticoats, and dauntless crusaders for women's votes! Though we adore men individually, we agree that as a group they're rather stupid."
Mary Poppins - guessed by Anna

4. "So happy I could shit."
"Chip, you know how I hate the brown word."
Serial Mom - guessed by Anna

5. "Who wants to hear about my STD from the silent film era?"
Grandma's Boy - guessed by Livvy

6. "And stop saying 'okay' all the time. Okay?"
"Okay."
"Good."
The Professional - guessed by Anna... although I think Livvy is right and the same dialog is in Blast From the Past

7. "Nice job, you fucked up date night."

8. "Juvenile delinquents are everywhere. Right here in this community. Boys with long hair and tattoos who spit on the sidewalk. Girls who wear tight slacks. Hysterectomy pants, I call them."
Cry-Baby - guessed by Anna

9. "This is a crucial question, Bob. Do you believe in the lord Jesus Christ and take him for your personal savior?"
Freeway - guessed by Anna

10. "Now this top line translates into, 'Pharaoh gobbles donkey goobers,' and the bottom line, 'Cleopatra does the nasty.'"
"Say what?"
"Well pretty much, that's the best I can translate it."
Bubba Ho-Tep - guessed by Anna

11. "No matter how many times you save the world, it always manages to get back in jeopardy again. Sometimes I just want it to stay saved! You know, for a little bit? I feel like the maid; I just cleaned up this mess! Can we keep it clean for... for ten minutes!"

12. "Do your children enjoy jazz music? For I am here to tell you that Cab Calloway, Dizzy Gillespie, Duke Ellington, and the whole weed-blowing ginger-colored lot are merely masquerading as musicians and are, in fact, agents of evil. Reefer slows down the smoker's sense of time, allowing him to squeeze in unnecessary grace notes, giving this voodoo music the power to hypnotize white women into indulging in acts of unspeakable degradation."
Reefer Madness - guessed by Anna

13. "Oh, nice. 16 Candles is on, man."
"And the award for the least heterosexual statement ever made in this apartment goes to..."
Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle - guessed by Livvy

14. "...you should stop eating. You see, when you skip a meal, your body feeds off its fat stores. And if you skip enough, maybe your body will eat your ass!"
Bring It On - guessed by Lissa

15. "What were you just doing?"
"What? Nothing!"
"Oh no, don't tell me nothing, you were just singing a show tune!"
"You're crazy, I'd never do that."
"You can't be suicidal if you're singing show tunes!"
Dead Man On Campus - guessed by Lissa

Movie Meme - Livvy

I tried to make mine easy :):

1. "Until mankind is peaceful enough not to have violence on the news, there's no point in taking it out of shows that need it for entertainment value."
Clueless guessed by Celeste

2. "Did you know there are 452 official kinds of cheese in this country, isn't that amazing? To find 452 ways to classify what is essentially a bacterial process? Don't you think that's amazing?"
"You would prefer one kind of cheese? One cheeseburger to put it on? One restaurant to eat it in?"
"I'm saying I *like* the cheese. God."
French Kiss guessed by Celeste.

3. "He's all right! Aren't you, cat? Poor cat! Poor slob! Poor slob without a name! The way I see it I haven't got the right to give him one. We don't belong to each other. We just took up one day by the river. I don't want to own anything until I find a place where me and things go together. I'm not sure where that is but I know what it is like. It's like Tiffany's."
Breakfast at Tiffany's guessed by Celeste.

4. "Welcome to prime time, bitch."
Nightmare on Elm Street 3 guessed by Celeste.

5. "Are you classified as human?"
"Negative, I am a meat popsicle."
The Fifth Element guessed by Anna.

6. "One scoop of creamed potatoes. A slice of butter. Four peas. And as much ice cream as you'd like to eat."
Secretary guessed by Anna.

7. "God forbid, I exude confidence and enjoy sex. Do you think I relish the fact that I have to act like Mary Sunshine 24/7 so I can be considered a lady? I'm the Marcia fucking Brady of the Upper East Side, and sometimes I want to kill myself. So there's your psychoanalysis, Dr. Freud. Now tell me, are you in... or are you out?"
Cruel Intentions guessed by Celeste.

8. "I saw a boat. "
"You did?"
"Yeah, it went by not too long ago. Follow me."
[few seconds later]
"Would you quit it? What, the ocean isn't big enough for you or something like that? You got a problem? Huh? Do ya, do ya, do ya? You wanna piece of me? Yeah, yeah! Ooh, I'm scared now! What?"
"What? You said you saw a boat."
Finding Nemo guessed by Anna.

9. "First I'm gonna use you as a human shield, then I gonna kill this guard over there, with the Patterson trocar on the table. Then I was thinking about breaking your neck."
True Lies guessed by Celeste.

10. "Didn't I tell you, you're the only one who can see me like this."
Mannequin guessed by Lissa.

11. "So what is it today? More spelunking?"
"No. Today it's BASE-jumping."
"BASE-jumping. Is that like parachuting?"
"Kind of. Do you have any light-weight fabrics?"
"You know... I think I got just the thing."
Batman Begins guessed by Celeste.

12. "I'm fireproof, you're not."
Hellboy guessed by Celeste.

13. "You threw a knife at my head!"
"Yes, and you caught it. Only the chosen one could have caught it."
"But... you *threw* a *knife*... at my *head.*"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer guessed by Celeste.

14. "What's with the Halloween costume?"
"This is NOT a costume. These are my clothes!"
Supergirl guessed by Celeste.

15. "Being dead wasn't a problem, but being forgotten, now that's a BITCH. I can't come back if nobody remembers me. I can't come back if nobody's afraid. I had to search the bowels of Hell, but I found someone, someone who'll make 'em remember. He may get the blood, but I'll get the glory, and that fear is my ticket home."
Freddy vs. Jason guessed by Celeste.

Movie Meme - Celeste

Some of these should be gimmes....

1. "We lived on a farm! And I got lonely! We were just a couple of crazy kids!"
Club Dread - guessed by Lissa

2. "I like to grease the highboard better than anyone and if it was just four or five guys, I'd have no problem with that, but when I come home and find her doing the two-backed beast with the entire church council, well by God, that's going too far - especially since half the council is women! That's when I take a stand. That's when I'm counted as a man! That's when I throw my balls up over my shoulder and charge into the fire!"
Ed and His Dead Mother - guessed finally by Anna

3. "The Living Dead and the dying living are all the same. Cut from the same cloth. But disposing of dead people is a public service, whereas you're in all sorts of trouble if you kill someone while they're still alive."
Cemetary Man - guessed by Lissa

4. "As Bertrand Russell once said, 'The only thing that will redeem mankind is cooperation.' I think we can all appreciate the relevance of that now."
"Was that on a beer mat?"
"Yeah, it was Guinness Extra Cold."
"I won't say anything."
"Thanks."
Shaun of the Dead - guessed by Anna

5. "Wait - would you rather live in the ascendancy of a civilization or during its decline?"
Revenge of the Nerds - guessed by Livvy

6. "Houses don't have memories."
Amityville Horror - guessed by Livvy

7. "Stand back boy! This calls for divine intervention!"
Dead Alive - guessed by Anna

8. "Let me out. Let me out of here. Get me the hell out of here. What's the matter with you people? I was joking! Don't you know a joke when you hear one? HA-HA-HA-HA. Jesus Christ, get me out of here! Open this goddamn door or I'll kick your rotten heads in! Mommy!"
Young Frankenstein - guessed by Anna

9. "What do we do with this guy?"
"I promised the professor that we take this guy alive. After you blow him all to hell, put one in his leg so we can tell the professor we tried."
Jason X - guessed by Anna

10. "Are we awake?"
"We're not sure. Are we black?"
"Yes, we are."
"Then we're awake, but very puzzled."
Blazing Saddles - guessed by Anna

11. "Where am I?"
"Back from the dead. I've saved you."
"My God! How?"
"By magic, of course. With a kiss, because I like you."
Flash Gordon - only guessed by Russ, despite the number of hints I gave

12. "You hate that job anyway. I don't see why you don't just quit."
"Because I want to fit in."
American Psycho - guessed by Livy

13. "...I'm not a very good shot...but the Samaritan here uses really big bullets."
Hellboy - guessed by Anna

14. "Hello, and welcome to Amsterdam's finest and most luxurious youth hostel. We feature one medium sized room containing 70 beds which can sleep up to 375 bodies a night. There is no bathroom. Nor is there one nearby. If you do not wish to have your valuables stolen I suggest destroying them or discarding them right now. You can also try hiding your valuables. In your anus. This will deter some but of course not all thieves. Once you are inside, the doors are chained and locked from the outside. They will not be opened again until morning, no matter what. Should a fire occur due to our faulty wiring or, uh, the fireworks factory upstairs you will be incinerated along with the valuables that you have hidden in your anus. Tips are greatly appreciated."
Eurotrip - guessed by Livvy

15. "Look, there's no point in arguing about this, all right? We need a solution. We need... we need to get some food over there."
"Yeah, OK, I have an idea. We draw straws and the loser runs across the lot with a ham sandwich."
Dawn of the Dead - guessed by Anna

Movie Meme

Rules:
+ Pick 15 of your favorite movies.
+ Go to IMDb and find a quote from each movie.
+ Post them here for everyone to guess.
+ Strike it out when someone guesses correctly, and put who guessed it and the movie.
+ NO GOOGLING/using IMDb search functions.

1. "People will look at the ashes of Westerburg and say, "Now there's a school that self-destructed, not because society didn't care, but because the school was society." Now that's deep."
Heathers guessed by Alicia

2. "I said I'd die for you!"
"No. You said you'd die with me. Cause you had nothing better to do."
Ginger Snaps guessed by Celeste

3. "Honey! C'mon over here, Sugar-buns. This machine just called me an asshole!"
Maximum Overdrive guessed by Celeste

4. "You better pray to the god of skinny punks that this wind doesn't pick up, cos I'll come over there, and jam an oar up your ass."
Tommy Boy guessed by Alicia

5. "What is the one thing that could ruin my senior prom?"
"That you would trip on your Barbie heels and I'd be named prom queen... Did I just say that out loud?"
Never Been Kissed guessed by Alicia

6. "Move it, garbage boy! You are COOKING? HOW DARE YOU COOK in my kitchen! Where do you get the gall to even attempt something so monumentally idiotic? I should have you drawn and quartered! I'll do it! I think the law is on my side! Larousse, draw and quarter this man - after you put him in the duck press to squeeze the fat out of his head!"
Ratatouille guessed by Olivia

7. "I rescued your hat."
"Well... that's the important thing."
Jurassic Park 3 guessed by Olivia (close enough)

8. "Look, this is an emotional moment for all of us, okay? I know that. Let's not make snap judgments, please. This is clearly-clearly an important species we're dealing with and I don't think that you or I, or anybody, has the right to arbitrarily exterminate them!"
"Wrong!"
Aliens guessed by Celeste

9. "She's not my girlfriend. I find her interesting because she's a client and because she sleeps above her covers... *four feet* above her covers. She barks, she drools, she claws!"
Ghostbusters guessed by Sonny

10. "Mom, I'm worried about Antonia. Did you know that she put on her mouse ears and drives around town, all liquored up, NAKED?"
Practical Magic guessed FINALLY by Celeste

11. "Everything. OK! I'll talk! In third grade, I cheated on my history exam. In fourth grade, I stole my uncle Max's toupee and I glued it on my face when I was Moses in my Hebrew School play. In fifth grade, I knocked my sister Edie down the stairs and I blamed it on the dog... When my mom sent me to the summer camp for fat kids and then they served lunch I got nuts and I pigged out and they kicked me out... But the worst thing I ever done - I mixed a pot of fake puke at home and then I went to this movie theater, hid the puke in my jacket, climbed up to the balcony and then, t-t-then, I made a noise like this: hua-hua-hua-huaaaaaaa - and then I dumped it over the side, all over the people in the audience. And then, this was horrible, all the people started getting sick and throwing up all over each other. I never felt so bad in my entire life."
The Goonies guessed by Alicia

12. "One thing about living in Santa Carla I never could stomach, all the damn vampires."
The Lost Boys guessed by Sonny

13. "Oh, God. I look 20 years old!"
A Nightmare On Elm Street guessed by Olivia

14. "Are you trying to kill me?"
"No, sweetheart. I'm making you not care. Okay?"
28 Days Later guessed by Celeste

15. "At least you'll never be a vegetable - even artichokes have hearts."
Amelie guessed by Olivia

Mommy's Little Helper - and I ain't talking pills

Roy Helping Mommy from Russ Wetzel on Vimeo.

Golden Delicious

In case you didn't know, Mike Doughty's new album, Golden Delicious, was released yesterday. I know I'm excited! I'm also feeling dumb that I've been working on the music channel for so many months now, and only just realized that they have one of his videos up on it...



And here's the latest video from his new album, for the song 27 Jennifers

Mike Doughty "27 Jennifers"

Add to My Profile | More Videos

And yes.... dorky me is having fun playing with the various snag/embed functions there are available out there. It's nice that you no longer even have to know basic html in order to add crap like that to your site/blog posts. They've just made it too damn easy!

Eating Experiment

So I was browsing through the comments section on this guest-blog post by Michael Pollan and one of the comments in particular struck me. Kathy Leland writes:

I am teaching "The Omnivore's Dilemma" this semester in my Introduction to Literature class (somewhat bucking the tradition that only fiction can be literature), so I'm very excited to tell my students about this site and the great opportunity to correspond with Mr. Pollan. I'm sure they will have many questions! Young people today have a very quixotic and disconnected relationship with the food they eat: they understand and heartily endorse the merits of environmental awareness, they recycle, they don't waste paper, they don't litter -- yet at the same time, they live on fast food, can't identify more than 4 or 5 vegetables, and often have no idea what a really great peach tastes like. I think "The Omnivore's Dilemma" should be required reading in a lot of college classes. I hope I am starting a trend.

...and that just struck me as wrong.

I probably cook with a decent bit more vegetables than the average American, but it got me to thinking of other ways I could expand my horizons, starting with seeing if I can take some suggestions. So... in the comments, list as many different vegetables as you can, the only rule being that you have to have actually eaten them. If I didn't include that qualifier... well, I know Anna and I could probably have a good time just sitting down and listing out all the veggies we can think of. You can include herbs and specific varieties as well (after all, I regularly eat at least 4 different kinds of potatoes). Any vegetables in the responses that I have not eaten, I will incorporate into my next week's menu, if they're available, or add to the menu as soon as they are. And maybe it'll encourage you guys to do it too!

I'll start: arugula, asparagus, artichokes, basil, beets, broccoli, broccolini, cabbage, chives, cilantro, corn, cucumbers, eggplant, fennel, garlic, green beans, green peppers, jalepeno peppers, leeks, mushrooms (portabella, shitake, white, cremini), okra, onions (white, yellow, red, boiling, green), oregano, parsnips, parsley, peas (garden, sugarsnap, snow), plantains, potatoes (yukon gold, white, red, 'new'), pumpkin, radishes, rutabagas, sage, shallots, spinach, squash (yellow, acorn, butternut, spaghetti), sweet potatoes, tarragon, thyme, turnips, tomatoes (plum, heirloom, common grocery, yellow), water chestnuts, zucchini.

What a difference the right cheese can make

Since Livvy asked me to give it to her, I'm going to go ahead and post my recipe for tamale pie. I hated the thing for years and years, but my husband loves it, so I'd keep making it. It was an easy weeknight dish you can toss together, and hey, sometimes it's not about what I want to eat.

I was never a big fan of parmesan either. Then I bought some real parmesan, and realized it wasn't that I didn't like the cheese, it was that I didn't like the cellulose filled pre-processed cheese-füd I'd been eating. Real parmesan cheese is incredible!

Well I finally found a way to cook tamale pie that I think makes it taste incredible as well. It's still just as easy, and all of a sudden, I can stomach more than a few bites and don't have to pretend I'm full. The secret was in the cheese. Oaxaca cheese, to be exact. Oaxaca is also called Asadero, and I find mine at Harris Teeter. If you can find some, try it, it's so wonderful.

So.... on to the recipe. You will need:
Hardware:
1 skillet large enough to sautee the beef, and hold the rest of the ingredients
1 8" square baking dish (or thereabouts)
1 largish bowl for the batter

Ingredients:
1 lb ground beef
1 sm tomato, diced small
1 sm green pepper, diced small
1 cup frozen corn
1 sm onion, minced
1 jalepeno pepper, minced
1 cup (or more to taste) oaxaca cheese, shredded
1 pkg cornbread mix (your choice, there. I'm too lazy to make my own cornbread batter, this is supposed to be a quick meal!)
chili powder
ground cumin
salt
pepper
other seasonings to taste

To cook:
Preheat your oven to whatever temp your cornbread tells you to.
Sautee the ground beef in the skillet with the onion, seasoning it up to your personal heat/spice preference.
While the beef is cooking, mix up the cornbread batter
Before the beef is quite done, add in the rest of the vegetable ingredients, leaving the tomato for last so it doesn't get all mushy, mix well.
Dump the whole mix into the baking dish, spreading it out evenly, and then layer on the shredded cheese.
Spread the cornbread batter on top, and pop it into the oven.
Cook for as long as your instructions for your cornbread batter tells you to, then take it out and let it settle down for five minutes or so.
Done!

I like to top mine with sour cream.

Russ the Rock Legend

LOL. I couldn't help it. I just had to tell all of you that Russ just beat Guitar Hero III on Hard. Go Russ!

Fido

If ever a movie was produced specifically for me, Fido would be it. It's got the '50s-style kitschy setting, the dark humor and zombies(!), all seemed aimed right at my weird-movie-loving heart.

The opening montage is fabulous. America has fought and won the Zombie Wars, and domesticated the undead, so that now the average citizen lives a lifestyle of relative ease, with tedious manual tasks relegated to rotting corpses with electric collars around their neck that keep their urge for flesh in check. Enter our hero, Timmy, a friendless runt of a kid with a father obsessed with death and terrified of zombies. (Dad is played by Dylan Baker, who I will always, unfortunately, associate with his creepy role as the child-raping dad in Happyness.) Timmy's mother buys the family a zombie, because they are the last family on the block who doesn't own one, and she hates to feel like she doesn't fit in. Lacking actual friends his age, Timmy names their new zombie Fido, and quickly develops a rapport with him.

Of course things can't stay that simple, and a la Dead Alive, Timmy's zombie breaks loose and kills a nasty old neighbor-lady. Rather than see his pet zombie destroyed, Timmy moves into damage-control mode and tries to cover up the crime, which of course results in a neighborhood-wide outbreak of zombies.

If you liked Ed and His Dead Mother, or Dead Alive, or Shaun of the Dead, this is a movie you'll probably enjoy. I loved it. It's been definitively entered into the "To Buy" list.

Not Panicky Under Pressure!

Who would have thought I'd actually have a reason to use the 'life threatening situations' tag so soon after Livvy created it?

Roy has had a runny nose for the past few days. Last night he slept poorly all night and when he woke up at 6am this morning, he had a fever. Tylenol brought it down for a little while, but he was breathing really fast, and the fever came right back up within a few hours. So I called the Dr. As luck would have it, the Dr's office closes early on Wednesdays, so all I got was the stupid answering service. I made them page Dr. Stonerock, and received a call back within a few minutes. Fever over 103, fast breathing, lethargic, not responding to Tylenol... Dr. says take him to emergency room just to be on the safe side.

So with less than ten minutes before I was supposed to give a presentation to the entire AOL Channels dev team on the project I'm leading, I had to IM my boss with "Can't do presentation. Have to go to emergency room. Tell them I'm sorry. Bye." And we were off.

Luckily, there wasn't anyone ahead of us when we arrived, and we were seen immediately. And that's where the fun began. Dose of Motrin to bring the fever down (BTW - I didn't know this, but you can mix Tylenol and Motrin together to get better fever control - just alternate the doses every 3 hours.) Probe in the butt to take Roy's temperature - 3 different times over the course of the visit, and boy he hated that! Tie a pulse sensor to his toe that I had to spend the next 3 hours trying to keep him from removing. Stick him with an IV to 'rehydrate' him, even though he'd already polished off 4 sippy cups that morning. X-Ray his chest - which Russ got to take him in for, and I could hear Roy screaming down the hall, since they had to strap him down to do it.

Finally, the verdict comes in, and Roy has pneumonia. Dose of antibiotics through the IV, and then wait another half hour after that for the nurse to come back and remove it, and the tape removal resulted in much screaming and crying as well. Four hours straight of keeping the kiddo from ripping out the IV or the pulse sensor and trying to keep him from full-on hysterics, which largely entailed pacing a two foot area and swaying with the kiddo in my arms. Damn but my back hurts now!

So now Roy is on both Tylenol and Motrin and antibiotics for the next ten days. I'm proud to say I didn't cry once. We'll be staying in and taking it easy for the next week or so, though.

Spoon!

Wow, but this has been just crazy times for me lately. Today was the first day I've had to even look at blogs or catch up on news... and I'm glad I did, because here is a real gem of an article for you: It's The Tick! (well, more like American Maid) In real life!

SO YOU'VE DECIDED to become a real-life superhero. Like Wolverine, you've chosen a secret identity and a uniform. But unlike the X-Man, you don't have retractable claws or a mutant healing factor. How do you make up the difference?

Most Reals use a combination of martial arts and weaponry. The Eye is a 49-year-old crimebuster from Mountain View, California, who wears a Green Hornet-inspired fedora and trench coat. Though he focuses mainly on detective work and crime-tip reporting, he prepares himself for hand-to-hand combat by studying kung fu and wielding an arsenal of light-based weapons designed to dazzle enemies. ...

Once you've honed your body and strapped on your utility belt, it's time to decide how to focus your heroic efforts. Within the community of Reals, there's a buffet of choices. Some choose mundane tasks—The Cleanser strolls around picking up trash, while Direction Man helps lost tourists find where they're going. Most Reals also lend their personages to charities, donating to food banks or organizing clothing drives.

So... if YOU were going to don a costume and be a REAL, who would you be?

New Years Resolutions!!

Everybody else has to do it too :). So here they are. My 2008 New Years Resolutions (in order of importance to me):

1. To not talk bad (or even think bad and if I do to stop it immediately) about people and especially not to hate on them.
2. To exercise consistently and get a Jessica Beal like body.
3. To pay off my credit card AGAIN (guh), and then start large payments on my student loans.
4. To graduate from College :). FINALLY!! This is actually really important to me, but I put it farther down on the list because it's pretty much a given.
5. To buy a house. Again, it's farther down on the list because I WILL BUY A HOUSE THIS YEAR!!!

K. Toodles :)!!

Panicky under pressure!!

So, I had an interesting weekend. I experienced something that I've never experienced before. I was rudely awakened at 8am on Saturday, after only 4 hours of sleep to an extremely loud buzzing noise. After about 30 seconds of it going off, I go "Nick, what the hell is that?" He mumbles, "I dunno." 30 more seconds pass by and I "NICK!! What the fuck?" At this point I thought he was pulling some mean prank on me, but he just mumbles "It's probably them." I'm thinking to myself "them who?" But, slowly I become more sensible and realize that the noise isn't just coming from only my apartment, but is surrounding us. So I go to the window, wondering if there's anything outside, like construction or something. Low and behold, I peak through the blinds and the entire building is on fire. Flames are licking up the whole outside of the apartments catty corner to mine and all I can see is FIRE and black smoke. With my over active imagination, I automatically think, "oh my god, the building is on fire, it's going to crumble, maybe explode (what with the oil tank being RIGHT next to where the fire is)! Then I launch into motion. I go "Nick, the buildings on fire, we have to get out of here." He launches out of bed and goes "What!?!" I'm stumbling around pulling on jeans and a robe. When I can't find the tie for the robe, I pull my coat on over it to secure it and then I go get the cat carrier. We only have one though which I see as a problem. Nick's just standing in the room staring at the clock (from my view point anyways) and I go "Nick what are you doing?!" We have to get the cats!!" Nick goes "I'm trying to get ready" And I go, "Oh my god, where's Pinky? Where's Stabby? I think I'm going to have a heart-attack..." So, Nick start looking for Pinky and I do too, without any success, but Nick finds them both behind the couch. Pinky, being spotted, runs for the room, and I trap him behind the hamper and grab him up to my chest in a grip that he was NOT getting away from. Nick's putting his shoes on in the living room and I go "Nick, why don't you have Sebastian? Wah!!" Nick goes, "I'll get him, I just need to get my shoes on..." I go "leave it and get the cat!" I guess Nick does what he wants anyways because he was definitely wearing shoes and socks when we got outside, but in my panicked state he did what I wanted and we trapped Stabby in the bathroom where Nick picked him up. He goes over to the one carrier and goes, "let's put them both in here," but I'm like..."No! I can smell the smoke! We have leave now." Nick goes..."this is how we lose our cats." But, we both head out the door and to the stairwell, where much more calmer individuals are walking down the steps. I guess they didn't have the vantage of the fire that I did, since it was directly in front of our apartment.

By the time we got outside, the fire department had it under control and pretty much put out. But, man was I scared!! Nick was definitely more in control than I was. You never know what you'll do in those situations, but now I know that I panic and definitely would've stayed in the apartment until I got our cats, fire or no! They kept us outside for 3 hours and then let most everyone else go back inside. 4 or 5 apartments were completely ruined by the fire, but ours was ok. It's scary to think about, but living in an apartment/condo building definitely has its risks. Like, anyone could burn down your house and ruin your life... I am much more motivated to buy my own house now. At least then if anything happened it would be my own damn fault.

I have a picture, post fire, but can't upload it right now. If I remember I will!

I can say "I can't".

When I was a little girl in Louisiana, my parents had me taking all sorts of lessons...ballet lessons, jazz lessons, baton lessons, even guitar lessons (the last two were short-lived, in fact, I barely remember them). It was during my dancing days that I remember hearing, for the first time, my instructor (Keitha Donnelly...geez, how do I still know that name?) telling me never to utter the words "I can't" when facing a difficult dance step.

Thirty years later I've heard the same phrase countless times...NEVER SAY CAN'T. Hell, there are tons of motivational books out there with people touting those words as if it were some magical phrase to suddenly boost the listener's ability to do something that they couldn't previously do. It's almost as if you were admitting you were some sort of a loser if you dared to concede to your inabilities.

Well, here it is...I can't put those Google pics in my post. I've tried Celeste's way. I've tried Livvy's way. I CAN'T figure it out! (I was actually able to get one little picture in there and after that, nothing). I suppose if I weren't trying to watch my tivo'd "Days of Our Lives" then maybe I'd have better luck. But, you see, I'm addicted to that show and I CAN'T bear to turn it off.

Posting this blog was much easier anyway!

Could not resist this

Town where I live:A bad habit of mine:
My last name:
The name of a past love:
My first name:
The name of a past pet:
My best friend's nickname:
My nickname:
My middle name:
City of my birth:
My first job:
My favorite place:
My favorite object:
My favorite food:
My favorite color:
My favorite animal:
My grandmother's name:
My college major:
A place I'd like to travel:
My age at next birthday:

Book Report: Samson Agonistes by John Milton

This is not so much a book report as an essay. I don't blog much because I never really feel like I have all that much to say since all I ever really do is school work on my time off. But that is something! Plus the purpose of this blog is to keep people up to date on what I have been up to, so I have decided to start posting some of the essays I write for class. You all might find it boring, but deal with it :). Anywho, this is the most recent one I've written. I'm not the best at grammar so there are probably a few grammatical errors, but overall I think it's a reasonably well written essay. 'Specially since I wrote it the day it was due. ENJOY!!

Also, if you'd like to read anything by John Milton, Dartmouth College has a website with all of his works. They have been annotated for your convenience as well. Here's a link:

Dartmouth Reading Room

Dalila as a Catalyst in Milton’s Play Samson Agonistes

In “The Temptation of Understanding,” an essay included in his book How Milton Works, Stanley Fish argues that he is unable to find an action or plot element within Samson Agonistes that links “the play’s two actions—Samson’s regeneration and his pulling down of the temple” (Fish 392). Also, his fall cannot be understood because there is forever the question of “why did Samson betray himself to Dalila” (Fish 392)? This question, Fish argues, is never satisfactorily answered and he goes on to say that the action in the plot that should logically take Samson from the beginning of the story to the end—Dalila’s visit—is nothing more than “a motiveless malignity, and thus the perfect complement to Samson’s causeless weakness” (Fish 402). In regards to Samson’s “weakness” he claims that referring it to God “has the effect of begging what is for the hero the central question of the play: In a world like this, what does one do” (402)? In other words if one is created to do God’s work, then how can one be sure that one is in fact doing it correctly? With this question, Fish manages to reject the God angle as an answer to why Samson is weak, because if one can never be sure of God’s intentions then one cannot argue that God is the cause. However, in a play that questions how one can know God’s intentions and then answers that question by implying that everything is God’s intent, God must be considered. Where Fish argues that the “cause/effect reasoning” of Samson Agonistes’ is not logically sequential, I will argue that it is. Milton, in using Dalila as the catalyst, successfully regenerates Samson from a dejected state where he questions his actions and God’s intentions, to a state where he is able to fulfill his predestined role of freeing the Israelites.

From early on in the play Milton’s characters argue to implicate or free from blame God in regards to Samson’s fall because they cannot understand that Samson’s current state could possibly have been Divine intention. Samson wars within himself when it comes to questioning God because for all his life he has trusted that his own actions were what God intended for him. In his current state however—blind, captive, fallen—he is unsure. Thus, in considering his weakness in telling Dalila that his strength is kept in his hair, he reasons that it his own fault and wonders “what if all foretold / Had been fulfill’d but through mine own default” (44-5). To Samson—at this point in the play—it is obvious that God would not have intended for him to err so grievously and the fault within Samson has naught to do with him. After all a blind dejected man, who has lost all of his powers cannot possibly deliver “Israel from Philistian yoke” (39). This forces one to the question however, that if God is the creator then how can he not have also created within Samson this flaw? And in his confusion, Samson moves on to implicate God. He notes that God, “when he gave [him] strength, to shew withal / How slight the gift was, hung it in [his] Hair” (58-9), and then later says that the “Vessel trusted to [him] from above, / [was] Gloriously rigg’d” (199-200). In other words, God sets Samson up to fall. Putting his strength in his hair makes it fragile and easily attacked, or shorn off as is the case. To make matters worse, Samson’s body has a flaw that makes him susceptible to the wiles of women. This can only mean of course that God intended for him to betray “the secret gift of God / To a deceitful Woman” (201-02) all along. The Chorus, not ready yet to believe that God would purposefully create someone to sin as a means of ensuring that his Divine plans will be enacted, reprimands Samson for making God culpable and tells him to “tax not divine disposal” (210). Thus, Samson, not able to blame God, and stating that Dalila “was not the prime cause” (234), reverts back to his original claim that he himself is to blame. However, the question remains: if God is the creator, then didn’t he also create Samson’s flaw? It is at this point in the play, with God still unaccounted for, that Dalila enters the play.

Dalila’s main role in this play is to debunk Samson’s previous reasoning as to why he succumbed to Dalila and fell by using his own arguments against him. She begins with an explanation that her “rash but more unfortunate misdeed” (747) is a common female weakness, not unlike the “weakness” Samson claims at the onset of the play when he states that the “seal of silence [he] could not keep, / But weakly to a woman must reveal it” (49-50). In result to this, Samson, who cannot—by virtue of the Bible—be like Dalila, must discard his claim to weakness because as Dalila has successfully demonstrated, anyone can make that plea. Samson decides that “all wickedness is weakness: that plea therefore / With God or Man will gain thee no remission” (834-35). Thus, Samson can no longer claim that his sin was caused by weakness because it is not a valid excuse. God will not forgive it and with weakness cast aside, Dalila tackles Samson’s uncertainty over his actions and God’s intentions.

Dalila compares her motivations to Samson’s and reveals that “the Priest / Was not behind, but ever at [her] ear, / Preaching how meritorious with the gods / It would be to ensnare an irreligious” (857-60). This can be directly correlated to the heroic life of Samson. If not already aware of Samson’s history, the Chorus brings it to the attention of the audience when it questions whether this “can this be hee, / That Heroic, that Renown’d, / Irresistible Samson?...The glory late of Israel” (124-26, 179). Here, the Chorus is relaying that Samson was a man to be admired, a savior. After all, Samson is the chosen one whose “birth from Heaven foretold / Twice by an Angel” (23-4). This idea forces Samson to question how he could have been so wrong as to misunderstand what God had planned for him. He did everything he thought God wanted of him, but instead of the glory predestined, “many evils have enclos’d [him] round” (194). However, with Dalila to compare himself to, someone who has been told just as he has, that to betray the “irreligious” would be estimable, he is forced to rethink his previous notion. Was he not going to betray Dalila for his people and his God, just as she betrayed him? Isn’t that the reason he married two Infidel women because “what [he] motion’d was of God; [he] knew / From intimate impulse” (222-23). This creates a problem though since Dalila is the enemy and therefore her actions cannot be godly. Thus Samson reckons they were done “in feign’d Religion, smooth hypocrisie” (872). He goes on to reason that “zeal mov’d [her]” (895), not Divine intent, and that furthermore, her gods are “gods unable / To acquit themselves and prosecute their foes / But by ungodly deeds, the contradiction / Of their own deity, Gods cannot be” (896-899). Samson is implying that Dalila’s gods are false gods which means that no longer can he call into question his actions or wonder if they were Divinely intended, because they must have been. If they were not, then his god is also a false god. In this instance then, as with the previous claim of weakness, Dalila fails to convince Samson that they are alike in their actions. All she manages to do is to help reinstate his notion that he is indeed God’s tool. This then is the catalyst for Samson’s regeneration. Through Dalila, he is able to remove the veil that was dropped over his eyes (note his blindness), and see that his actions—including his inherent flaw which caused him to fall—and their results were God’s intent. Thus, although Samson may still be blind, no longer is the “work of God to [Samson] extinct” (70). Dalila has effectively aided Samson in regaining his self-assurance, some strength, and most importantly his unquestioning faith in God. Because Samson questioned God though, however briefly, it is necessary for him to adhere to his religious laws.

When the first messenger appears and tells Samson that the Philistian Lords require “some public proof” (1314) of his extra-human strength, Samson automatically answers in the way his religious laws demand: No. He does not question, just outright refuses. The Chorus however, implies that perhaps Samson should not be so hasty in his refusal because he is still their slave and as such will be forced to serve “the Philistines, / Idolatrous, uncircumcis’d, unclean” (1363-64) anyways. Samson explains that there is a difference between “vaunting [his] strength in honour to thir Dagon” (1360) and the “honest and lawful” (1365) labor he would undergo as their slave, and according to his religious laws, the former act God would never forgive, but the latter he would. The Chorus however explains that “where the heart joins not, outward acts defile not” (1368). In other words, it does not matter the action; if one’s heart is not in it, if one is forced into it, then one will not be defiled. Samson argues that he is not being forced into performing these feats of strength though because the “the Philistian Lords command. / Commands are no constraints” (1371-72). Thus, if Samson consented to perform at Dagon’s Temple, then he would be doing it “freely; venturing to displease / God for the fear of Man…which in his jealousie / Shall never, unrepented, find forgiveness” (1373-76). Because the product of Dalila’s visit however, was not merely to reinforce Samson’s trust in his religion, but also in the “intimate impulses” he receives from God, he recalls an opinion voiced earlier in the play by the Chorus: God’s “own Laws he can best dispence” (314). Samson moves on to reason that since God has dispensed of his laws in the past—such as when he “motion’d” (222) that Samson should marry the woman from Timna—why should this instance be any different? This opinion, initially ignored and thus dismissed by Samson, can now be accepted. Samson thus, reasons that God “may dispense with [him] or thee / Present in Temples at Idolatrous Rites / For some important cause, thou needst not doubt” (1369-79). With this in mind, Samson reassuredly goes with the messenger without fearing that he will dishonor his God or his religion. He claims that “this day will be remarkable in my life / By some great act, or of my days the last” (1384-89). Thus, it can safely be assumed that a regenerated Samson is now ready to pull down the temple.

Milton’s play, Samson Agonistes, successfully links “the play’s two actions—Samson’s regeneration and his pulling down of the temple” (Fish 392) by using Dalila as the catalyst. To see this however, God must be implicated as the cause. Fish who dismisses God as questionable, fails to see the logically sequential “cause/effect reasoning” of Milton’s play. At the onset of the play Samson’s faith in his deeds and what he thought were Gods intentions, is in question. Dalila comes to visit, and through her attempts to “debase [Samson] / And aggravate [his] folly” (999-1000), she is instead able to reinforce Samson’s unquestioning belief in God and his religion and therefore reassure him that his actions were indeed the intentions of God. Through his restored faith Samson is once again able to act on one of his “intimate impulses” and fulfill his destiny by freeing his people. Thus, through Dalila, Samson is once again able to find stable ground and reassuredly do Gods work.

[Not included in the essay that I turned in, but something that would be interesting to further consider, is why John Milton’s play, Samson Agonistes, portrays Samson in this light. Samson’s regeneration is ridiculous. The fact that Samson is able to regain his strength and purpose merely because God and his religious laws say that he cannot be like Dalila (though he is in all respects) is hypocritical, and it is no accident that Milton implies this. Also, something to consider would be why does Milton write the main action of the play (Samson’s pulling down of the temple) to take place off stage? Everything that Samson accomplishes is by word of mouth only, and other main characters do not actually see what happens. This parallels the idea that history is written by the victors, not the losers. In other words, are the accounts accurate? Was it really “God’s intent” or the intent of the people? And furthermore, how can you be sure? Thus, I would probably argue that Milton’s intent was to speak out against the Catholic Church and the problems he saw within it. Through a close reading of this play and others written by him, one can easily see that although Milton was a Christian, he saw many problems within the church that needed fixing.]

Works Cited

Fish, Stanley. How Milton Works. Cambridge: Harvard University Press, 2001. 391-405.
Milton, John. "Samson Agonistes." The Riverside Milton. Ed. Roy Flannagan. Boston: Houghton Mifflin Co, 1998. 784-844.

I don't know how to copyright my essays, but I am claiming that it is!! This is copyrighted by Olivia Bilby.